Take charge of your life

Sometimes we have to learn things the hard way.

I was a high performer and a go-getter at my former company (still am, but with a much better attitude!). A boss told me once, “If you don’t buck up, ship out.”

It was devastating, and I reacted with anger. It felt like unjustified feedback, coming from a place of misunderstanding. From then on whenever things didn’t go well at the office, I would blame my boss. I became resentful and held a grudge for years.

I dug up this incident again some years later and rehashed it to a trusted friend. I went on and on justifying how it was my right to be angry, didn’t my boss know that I was going through a personal challenge at the time? Why didn’t they understand? All they ever did was take from me! It was self-pity at its finest.

My friend didn’t see it the same way and snapped at me, “Stop it! How many years have you held on to this? If you want to be known as a reliable leader of your community, stop blaming and start taking responsibility for your decisions. Holding on to this grudge is your choice.”

It was a much-needed slap in the face.

It might sound harsh, but I knew that what was told to me in love by my trusted friend was nothing but the hard truth. I sat with it for a while, and started to gain some insight about my attitude. Here’s what I learned:

If you want to experience unparalleled personal growth, take charge of your life.

Challenges and problems are just invitations to become better versions of ourselves. Taking responsibility for your life is a choice. It doesn’t mean you have to control everything in your life, but you can control how you respond to challenges and how it affects you.

So don’t shy away from challenges. It might seem hard, but we gain the most from working through difficulties - by learning how to make the best out a less-than-ideal situation.

So try not to complain about the cards you’ve been dealt with. Take a deep breath, calm yourself, and make the best of it. I promise that you will come out the other side as a better, healthier person. ●